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Never Accuse A Man Of Drinking Michelob Light
Never Accuse A Man Of Drinking Michelob Light

Michelob Ultra was new to our bar (an Outback Steakhouse). We had a guest who had had a few too many Mich Ultras and when we decided it was time for him to stop drinking we gave him his receipt. Unfortunately, we hadn't updated our POS system to include Ultra, so all Mich Ultras were listed as Michelob Light...he saw that, screamed out 'I DIDN'T DRINK NO GOD DAMNED MICHELOB LIGHT!' and threw his 22oz glass mug at the other bartender, who immediately turned around (the mug missed) and said, quite calmly, 'you need to get the heck out of my bar!' Jimmy, our 5'4" server in the room with us, ran over and picked this guy up by the arm pits and carried him over to the back door (To Go) and slammed him into the door to open it...unfortunately, the To Go door had been locked because we were closing. He hit the door with some decent force, let out an audible 'UNGH!' and then collapsed to the ground in pain. It must have sobered him up slightly because he very sheepishly came back and apologized and paid for his drinks, but man was it insane for about 20 seconds or so." (Source)

Must Have Been A Pretty Rough Day To Get Drunk At A Pizza Hut
Must Have Been A Pretty Rough Day To Get Drunk At A Pizza Hut

"So one time I was working around 2 pm and the place is empty, just me and one other employee. I see a guy pull up in a brand new Caddy CTS and he comes in with a nice leather messenger bag over his shoulder. He makes small talk with me and proceeds to sit down and orders a large pepperoni pizza and a coke for himself. I place the order and walked away. I keep coming back to his table to see if needs anything and he just keeps pounding through cokes. Next thing I know I hear a crash of glass, which was peculiar because we have all plastic drink ware. I come over to find an empty 1L bottle of Jack on the floor. He finished the whole bottle, stood up, and fell right back down. He tried getting his car keys, but they're at the bottom of his empty plastic cup. I call him a cab and give the cabby my number to let me know where he dropped him off at (so I can make contact with him the next day). Oh by the way, I worked at a Pizza Hut. Not a bar." (Source)

Wonder Who The Senator Was?
Wonder Who The Senator Was?

"I work in DC as a banquet bartender for hire. I was at a very prestigious hotel downtown that hosts many large galas that entertain celebrities and politicians alike. At these events banquet bars are, of course, open bars so people can have as much as they like free of charge. I was working one event that had several senators and needless to say some of them can drink. One senator in particular was really knocking back some Makers Mark and was getting a bit rowdy. You could tell people were getting uncomfortable with his behavior, but it wasn't until he slapped one of the servers on the bottom that I had to come out from behind my bar (which is a huge no-no in the business) grab the drink out of his hand and sternly say, 'No more!' You could tell he was emasculated and behaved himself after that. It definitely felt great having power over one of the guys that runs our nation. Sorry I can't give names or specifics, but a nondisclosure waver is part of the job..." (Source)

Never Cut Off A Railroad Worker
Never Cut Off A Railroad Worker

"Been about ten years now since I've tended bar. Had a group of big guys in there one night, been there about 3 hours, but one of the guys hadn't got up in a while, so didn't realize how drunk he had gotten. Anyway, must have been his turn to buy, cause he comes stumbling up to the bar, almost knocks over a table on the way. Orders a round for the table. I tell him, 'I think you've probably had enough.' He says what? I say 'You've had enough, you're drunk.' His reply, and I'll never forget this 'I'm not drunk, I work for the railroad!' Completely serious. I just stared at him for about 10 seconds. He says it again. I just walked away and his friends came up to the bar and led him out the door. It's often made me wonder what kind of training program the railroads have." (Source)

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