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A Trip Gone Sour.
A Trip Gone Sour.

"After visiting the Grand Canyon we swung south to catch some of the historic Route 66. Before we left we visited Mr. D'z, a famous retro burger joint. I ordered and ate their huge cheeseburger, it was a gloriously juicy monstrosity and needless to say, I left pleasantly stuffed. As we headed East the good feelings began to wane as general gastrointestinal malaise set in. I scanned the horizon for any sign of a rest stop, but there was nothing but desert in all directions. The discomfort quickly exacerbated into the warning bells of an imminent gut bomb. With the speedometer needle quivering at 90 I frantically begged for any tree, shrub, anything at all as I became convinced that Satan had hatched that cheeseburger into an angry, live scorpion in my lower gut. After what seemed like an eternity, tiny dots appeared on the horizon: an Indian Trading Post. Hunched over like a sumo wrestler, I tersely uttered 'rest room' to the clerk, who smiled knowingly at my obvious discomfort. 'Round back' she said. Summoning all my pucker power, I proceeded to what I envisioned to be the end of my misery: a clean, cool rest room. What I encountered was a scene reminiscent of the scene in the movie Trainspotting. It was a rest room in theory only. There was no door on this chamber of horrors, no door on the toilet stall, no toilet seat on the toilet, no toilet paper and two bikers were shooting up at the sink. Most of the events that followed are too shocking for disclosure. Eventually I made it to a kinder, gentler rest stop where I was able to burn my clothes and clean up" (Source).

Consuming Paper.
Consuming Paper.

"I've probably consumed about ten pounds of paper because I thought it was part of a cake. There is a super popular cake in Japan that I love. It typically comes wrapped in a thin sheet of paper. I thought the paper was part of the cake and always wolfed it down along with cake. At that point, I had just come to Japan and my Japanese wasn't good enough to read the warning not to eat the paper. The most annoying thing is that several Japanese friends WATCHED me do this. I'm pretty sure they just didn't want to embarrass me by saying, 'Hey, dude. You know you're eating paper, right?' But a small part of me wonders whether they secretly found it amusing and wanted to see if I would figure it out myself. Well, I didn't!" (Source).

"There Was No Second Date."

"A cute guy I didn't know very well asked me out on a date. He took me to dinner and much to my disappointment pulled up to a sushi restaurant. In my nervousness, I'd forgotten to mention I was a vegetarian and not wanting to be rude, I decided to 'go with the flow' and order whatever vegetable dishes were available. Asians eat a lot of veggies, right? I had never had sushi before and didn't know what to expect. I admitted my lack of experience to my date. He laughed and told me he would order for me. He ordered a bunch of exotic sounding dishes I'd never heard of before then excused himself to use the restroom. The waiter arrived with warm hand towels and a little bowl of fresh 'green peas' and set them before me. I washed my hands then popped one whole 'pea' into my mouth. Big mistake. I worked on that sucker trying to get it to break down enough so I could swallow it. They were huge. Right before my date arrived back to the table I thought about ditching the half-chewed fibrous, slobbery soybean mess into the hand towel, but the waiter diligently swooped in and removed my crumpled washcloth before I could spit my mouthful into it. Now my date sat before me and I sat there petrified, chewing. Chewing, chewing! I saw him reach over and break open one of the little green peas and eat the seeds out. 'Try some edamame.' He offered. No thanks, already working on some, I think. Dinner arrives. It looks awful. Raw fish. I'll just sit here and chew. I don't touch a bite. Cute guy gets increasingly angry. It ends with him saying, 'Well if I knew you were a vegetarian I would have taken you someplace else, but it would have been nice for you to at least spit out your gum during dinner.' There was no second date" (Source).

Babybel Cheese
Babybel Cheese

"I love those those mini Babybel cheeses with the red wax on the outside. Yes, it tastes so good. The moment I bite into the red outer covering and slowly started chewing it as if I was a part of ad. Yummmmm. Until the day I discovered that it was wax. Wax that was meant to cover the cheese and protect it. That's when I started freaking out. Did some online reading and realized that it's non-toxic. Safe! Somewhere deep down I had a feeling something was not right or I wasn't doing something the right way. It was probably in my stomach which hurt me every time I ate this" (Source).

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