"My little brother (13 year age difference) wanted Fettuccine Alfredo when we went out for Italian. Since all he wants to eat is some form of bread and cheese (mac 'n cheese, grilled cheese, pizza) we made him get some grilled chicken and broccoli on the side. He whined. After finishing his pasta, we made him take some bites of broccoli. In an act of rebellion, he pretended to gag. Involuntarily, he caused himself to throw up all over the table. Awkwardly, we had to wait for the check in the middle of the packed restaurant. I glanced over as my mom signed.
...She didn't even tip 20%."
"Out at a Tapas place in Sydney for my wife's birthday with about 20 others. This friend of ours has just got back from the US and brought along some pepper spray that he smuggled in (it's illegal in Australia). Anyway, after about 20 sangrias too many, he does the tiniest little spray of the pepper spray to show another friend what it's like.
1 minute later: Everyone at our table is coughing.
2 minutes later: The entire restaurant is coughing.
3 minutes later: The restaurant is evacuated.
10 minutes later: Ambulances turn up and start giving people oxygen. Fun times."
"When I was 5 or 6, I was having lunch with my mom and bit into a cherry tomato without closing my mouth first. That thing was like a geyser; it shot this (small) wave of tomato guts all the way across the table and right in the perfect center of my mom's white shirt. She was not pleased. I felt horrible."
"I was trying to impress a date and took her to an expensive French restaurant. I accidentally set my menu on fire when I leaned it down to look at her while she was speaking. Those little candles on the table are dangerous!
We both had a good laugh after all of the excitement was over (despite the nasty looks and sneers from those around us). We're married now."
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