"One of my best friends growing up recently confessed in a drunken haze to me that his dad had abused him and his brother for four years. It didn't stop until his uncle caught his dad in the act and almost beat him to death. His uncle's brief prison stay was always a mystery before that."
"One of my buddies and I were pledging at the same fraternity when he dropped a big one. I knew he was from some country in Africa, but he had been very private about it for the most part. Now I know why: he had been taken from his village in Uganda when he was very young and forced to watch them kill his family. He then killed about 14 people as a child soldier; heavy stuff."
"At my wedding reception, the best man's wife got drunk enough to confess to me that she was in love with my (brand-new) husband and had been for years but 'the time was never right' for them to be together. She rambled on about maybe someday they would both be single at the same time...
I was utterly gobsmacked but it was a noisy environment (music, family & friends all talking and laughing) and she was clearly much the worse for drink so I just kind of laughed and made some inane comment like, 'Oh, well, you can't win 'em all' and just tried to let it pass. Then I think she realized how inappropriate she was being and hastened to wish us all the best for a long and happy marriage, gushing over how perfect we are for each other, etc. On reflection, I was quietly freaked out about it but I knew my husband was oblivious to her, and 100% committed to me.
That was 11 years ago. I did eventually tell my husband. He seemed embarrassed at the revelation and felt a bit awkward, I'm sure. He expressed sadness for his best man's sake -- that they don't seem to have a very 'happy' marriage although they have been together for many years and they have two kids. My husband plays golf with his best man from time to time but we don't socialize with them as a couple. I'm not a fool."
"We have this friend who has a lightning bolt tattoo that we always make fun of, mostly because he won't tell us what it means and it looks like the Gatorade symbol.
One night a couple of months ago, he and I get drunk off straight Vodka. He starts talking about getting more tattoo's and his ideas so I asked him if he'd tell me what the lightning bolt meant. He said back in 2008, he was going through a really rough patch and he started thinking about suicide. On one particularly hard night, he finally decided to go through with it. He had access to a couple of guns, took one and put it in his mouth and pulled the trigger.
The gun jammed. He said the instant he pulled that trigger he regretted it beyond words and had never been more grateful for life.
Apparently, that night there was a really rare thunder and lightning storm (we almost never get those here) and he saw the flash of lightning and realized his time wasn't up yet. He said he learned that night that no matter how bad life gets it really does go on; he got the lightning bolt tattoo to remind himself. I had a new understanding of him that night."
"My friend told me that her little brother was actually her son. She was 15 when she gave birth to him, and her parents decided it would be best to raise him as their own. She basically fell to pieces that night - I've never seen such agony in a person in my life. She went on for a couple hours about how hard it was to keep it a secret not only from virtually everyone she cared about but from the boy as well. To hear her describe having her child say 'mama' for the first time to her mother instead of herself, how it was tearing her apart to watch him grow up in a lie., she was regretful and horrified by what she had set into motion. To be party to those emotions was devastating.
I didn't know what to say. What could ANYONE possibly say to a person in that situation? There's no advice to give, no amount of words could possibly lend comfort, so I just held her hand and cried with her as she confessed to me that she fantasizes constantly about telling him the truth and how frightened she was that she would ruin his life by telling him the truth one day; how it kept her up at night, how it ate at her, enveloped her, alienated her.
She killed herself three months later. A lot of people were confused as to why but I never breathed a word of it to anyone."
"My old high school boyfriend that I hadn't seen for three years (now age 23), but still cared for, appeared at my door two nights before his wedding and told me he still loved me and was only marrying his fiancée to please her, her parents, and his parents. He said he felt trapped and put his arms around me and started sobbing with his head on my shoulder. We talked awhile and he sobered up a bit. He married the girl and they had a child, but he died of testicular cancer at age 25. Sometimes I still dream about him."
"He told me that his dad wasn't really a diplomat always abroad, he was an addict that OD'd and died. I know it could happen to anyone but this guy is so polished, well adjusted, and just awesome - you'd never be able to tell he comes from such a place of hurt. He told me all the messed up stuff his dad did to his family before he died, even breaking in and stealing all their valuables to sell after his mom kicked him out."
"While drunk, my dad revealed to me that when he was in Vietnam, as the radio guy, he called in an air strike that ended up spraying napalm over his platoon. He didn't know if it was his mistake, or the pilot's, but I knew then why he didn't talk about Vietnam while sober."
"In college, there was one guy in our group of friends who started acting funny close to the end of our third year. We were all worried about him, but he seemed mostly ok and we were guys, so we didn't push. I thought maybe he was gay and working up the courage to come out, so I just tried to be extra friendly and there for him.
Queue two nights before the end of exams, he and I are out drinking and I finally call him on it. 'You've had something on your mind for a while now, and I want you to tell me what it is.' It turns out that he had decided to kill himself and had come up with a plan to do it. It was a Thursday, and he was going to go through with it on a Saturday. We were already drunk off our butts, so not knowing what else to do, I just pushed him for more details of his plan and told him that I loved him.
I crashed, woke up the next morning to my alarm set for 7 am and a scrawled note to myself saying, 'Frank is going to kill himself tomorrow - stop him.' Not knowing what else to do, I called his mother, and through a hungover haze, managed to get her to accept that this was real and that if we handled it right, we could stop him and get him through this.
By the time I hung up with her, we had a solid plan in place, had him picked up by the cops and institutionalized for three days and put on suicide watch. Parents, siblings, friends, and councilors were all there for him, he got through his depression and 20 years later, he's still ok. It ruined the whole group dynamic though, everyone was so upset that we all stopped hanging around together after that. Miss those guys, but no regrets."
"Last year I was at this party with some friends from my campus. Me and another boy go outside for a smoke. On our way up the stairs, this boy sat down and he just got this sudden sad look. I asked what was bothering him. He tells me that he's a psychopath - he had absolutely no genuine feelings towards others...he said it all was an act. Then he said that he could easily go in and kill everyone one of us at the party without feeling any remorse or guilt. He then said he had never told this to anyone before. This was the second time I have ever had a conversation with him.
I always thought he was a bit odd, but I just thought it was who he was. But that right ther, was just a bit out of my league."
"When my mom got drunk one Christmas, she revealed to me that she was secretly dying of a genetic kidney disease and needed a new kidney. I got tested to see if I could give her mine. Turned out I had the same disease. If she hadn't have gotten drunk, I would never have known and we both would have died (I hustled her up a kidney on Facebook and she's doing well now)."
"I was outside of a party at this house making out with a very attractive girl when my ex-coworker comes out the front door stumbling, walks over to me as we're fooling around and he starts being emotional. I froze and was like 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DUDE?' in my head. He starts explaining to me how he's gay and always thought I was cute, confessing all the stuff he wants to do to me.
The girl I was with started cracking up and I just walked away with her and he left the party. I don't care if you're gay, but getting in the way of a hookup BECAUSE you are gay is another story, and I will treat you with hostility."
"I think the most shocking secret came from a girl I used to be friends with. She was beautiful, probably could've modeled professionally; extremely ambitious and smart. She was in Catholic school at the time and had her entire future elaborately planned out. She had such confidence, she could walk into a room and everyone would become so insecure about themselves in an instant. She was never really interested in dating or boys; schooling took up so much of her time that she didn't have much of a social life. Everyone that knew her assumed that she was a goody-good girl that never did anything that wasn't written down in her planner.
One night she invited me over while her parents were out of town. We had never done anything together just by ourselves before, we had only spent time through mutual friends, so I was nervous we wouldn't have fun. To my delightful surprise, she wanted to raid her parent's liquor cabinet. A couple hours later she tells me the story about how she ended up in Catholic school in the first place, a story that she never told anybody until that night.
First thing she tells me is that she suffers from Bipolar disorder, which was really surprising to me, she hid it really well. During one of her manic episodes, she went to a homecoming dance at her old high school. She and four other boys went into the boy's locker room and she fooled around with them until the school staff found them. She was expelled, so her family moved two hours away and sent her to the Catholic school she was attending at the time. She made me promise not to tell anybody, it was never brought up again.
Fast forward one year. I see her at a party. When I came in she proudly exclaimed to me that she had fooled around with seven men that night and was about to have number eight. I tried to give her a ride home but she refused. I never saw her again after that."
"Five of us are sitting at a big round table at an all-night diner right next to our bar. It's a very common place to go after bar close, and one of two of the only places open that late.
So a dude comes in, wasted, of course, sits down on the opposite side of the table and says: 'I have AIDS...aw man, I have AIDS.'
Now, I don't think he meant to say this, and the way he said it makes me believe it was one of those things that was on his mind and drunkenly came out. We all just look at each other for a minute and are like, 'Alright dude, that sucks.' We kinda go off into our own conversations after talking about it for a second or two.
Cue a drunk girl who wants to fool around with AIDS man. She walks in and sits down next to him and one of our group is like, 'Dude's got AIDS' (yeah, we're kinda jerks with soft hearts).
She starts freaking out on all five of us, thinking we're all in on trying to keep them apart. The AIDS dude is denying he ever said he had AIDS. It goes on, eventually, they leave. I'm pretty sure they slept together too."
"In high school, we were wasted and my friend told me that the little girl she babysits is actually her child that she gave up for adoption a few years ago. No idea my good (lesbian) friend had a child at 14. Not to mention a child that I've met before, and had no idea it was hers."
"I met a couple of Southern hillbilly type guys in Naknek, Alaska during a salmon fishing season in the mid-'90s. They were among the many you meet who come up there looking for jobs on fishing boats.
I had a seasonal business, so my business partner and I would get tons of these guys hitting us up for work. We would work hard and play harder and ended up partying with these guys. I never actually learned their names, we called them Billy Bob and Bubba or something.
We had a hilarious night and a great time with these guys, it was one of those times when you can't stop laughing hysterically. That's when the bigger, tougher one with the hunting knife got serious and told us about how they had picked up a female hitchhiker, attacked and killed her. The other one got this satisfied look on his face and nodded like it was no big thing. It was incredibly creepy.
I had to get on the boat the next day, and when the season was over they were still in town and wanting to hang out and asked if they could maybe crash at my house in Seattle. I lived with three girls - no thanks.
Working on boats over the years, I've met all sorts of psychos and have slept with a knife more than once, but that night has bothered me for years. It may have been nonsense, but I doubt it."
"One night we were having a party in my apartment and this chick who everyone knew was the overachiever and very proper got drunk. She then was trying to grab everything she could get her hands on out of curiosity and would talk about it.
After grabbing a few things, she saw a small tub of icy-hot and said, 'Some kids from high school rubbed this all over my body after assaulting me,' and just continued picking up stuff from the apartment. It killed my buzz but good thing only me and my buddy heard her and no one else from the party thanks to the music."
"A wasted friend once told me his father used to systematically cheat on his mother, and that he had a son from one of these affairs - literally my friend's brother from another mother who was the same age as us. He was crying terribly and I didn't really know what to do.
This was when I was 17 or so. I'm 27 today. It made me realize just how bad cheating is. Don't cheat - if it's not working, try to fix it, or just end it, but don't cheat - cheating is the worst."
"My friend admitted to participating in war crimes while in Afghanistan. The tour he was on when the events happened was redacted, which means although he was in the country, all records of what he was party to were erased/deleted, so he is in the clear.
He said, 'If I wasn't so good at keeping my mouth shut, they'd probably throw me to the wolves. I'm real good at not causing problems.' He now works as an intelligence officer. The crimes were related to prisoner detainees. I never asked what happened, he never offered details.
So he's in the clear so to speak, but I can tell the events weigh on him. This is probably the case with most soldiers. It's been a few years, the whole event bothers me. It seemed at the time that he wanted/needed someone to talk to, but he couldn't. I'm very glad I was too cowardly to join the forces."
"I was around 7 or 8 years old and my father was very drunk (as usual) when I visited him. I was staying over at his place and he decided to show me something.
He unscrewed the electric socket from the wall and showed me there was a hidden compartment. Inside he had a couple thousand euros. This was soon after Euros came to Finland, and I asked him where he got them.
He said,'I sto- got them' and he also said there was more hidden at my grandfather's place.
I never asked him more about it and know nothing of it, but it's pretty obvious he'd stolen the money. I didn't really realize it as deeply until later on, but at the time of this slip up he had been unemployed for a few years and he lived off of his ladyfriend and the government."
"My friend's little sister (we'll call her Jen) recently broke up with her boyfriend of 6 years. In the last year of their relationship, she developed a small crush on my closest male friend (he'll be called Ben). Never acted on it or anything, just a crush. Now, our group of friends have all known each other for about 10 years, we have a lot of history and we all hang out as a group constantly. This is important because the amount of time we all spend together and how close we are makes this situation so much stickier for me.
Now, Ben started dating a girl that was good friends with Jen (she'll be Sally). Jen encourages their relationship as she has a boyfriend and all. Fast forward to 5 months later, her boyfriend leaves her very suddenly, she was totally blindsided and heartbroken. She goes out with all of us about 5 days after the breakup and rides home with Ben. We think nothing of it, he's in a relationship and he's not that kind of dude.
The other night we were all at a concert for Halloween, Jen drank and told me in confidence that she and Ben had hooked up that night after Ben had told her he was planning to break up with Sally. He told her he always thought the two of them would be so good together and that he wants to be with Jen and they've always had a deep connection and attraction, blah, blah, blah. She feels terrible because then he stayed with Sally, and since Sally is a friend she has no idea how to act around her or Ben and the guilt is killing her.
This girl is like a little sister to me and he is one of my best friends. I'm extremely angry at him because I believe he manipulated a girl who was heartbroken and vulnerable. That being said, I believe she has ownership in what happened as well. I have no idea how to handle it and I can't tell anybody or talk to anyone about it. I have become friends with Sally over the months they have been dating and I feel just terrible knowing and not telling her. I don't want to throw anyone under the bus even though I'm pissed and I can't stand being around Ben and Sally knowing what happened but I have to act as though nothing is wrong and that sucks big time."
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