Nice Try

pathdoc/Shutterstock

Nice Try

"I used to work at Jimmy John's.

When we made a drive-thru order, the person who wrapped the sandwich would bag it and toss it across the restaurant to the drive-thru person to hand it out after they took the payment.

I was the drive-thru person and dropped the wrapped and bagged sandwich. Without thinking, I just picked it up and handed it to the customer.

He said, 'You're seriously going to serve me that?'

My instant reaction was to ask, 'Oh, you saw that?'

He was not amused."

Acting Like A Martyr Would Get This Customer Nowhere

CREATISTA/Shutterstock

Acting Like A Martyr Would Get This Customer Nowhere

"I used to wait tables when I was younger. One summer day, I was waiting tables on the patio during a lunch rush. I had this couple in their 20s sit down and order. She got an Asian noodle salad.

When I went to do the quality check of the meal, the woman told me her noodles were soggy. I apologized and told her I could bring it back and get her a fresh one. She refused it. I said I could bring her more crispy noodles on the side to add in. She declined that as well. I made a couple of other offers to fix the issue, but she turned those down also. Then she said, 'I don't want it to happen to anyone else... I'll eat it... but I don't want anyone else to have this problem too.'

Right before I could even stop to think, I said, 'Oh, so you're a martyr?' Her boyfriend busted out laughing, and she looked stunned. I immediately realized what I said and apologized profusely. Luckily the dude paid and I got a good tip anyway."

This Manager Had No Time For These People's Crap

Ollyy/Shutterstock

This Manager Had No Time For These People's Crap

"I was working at this pizza shop a couple of years ago. An hour after we closed, two guys tried to come into our lobby. We had the 'closed' sign on the door, so it was pretty obvious the door was locked. So they walked around to the drive-thru window and kept ringing the buzzer. Finally, my manager opened the window and told them we were closed. They just kept trying to order food, and finally, after 15 minutes, my manager caved and took their stupidly large order. I think it was two medium pizzas, a large salad, and a dozen wings.

They didn't like the price and started complaining that it was a rip-off. My manager stood firm and told them to pay or get out. So they reluctantly paid, and I started making the food.

We eventually handed over the food, and they drive off. Just as we were setting the alarm to leave, we received a call. My manager picked it up on the last ring and put it on speaker phone. It was those guys. They called to complain that the wings we gave them weren't all drums and that the salad didn't have enough dressing packets. So they demanded we refund them and make them a new order. My manager said, without even an ounce of hesitation, 'Yeah, you can go eff off, you piece of crap.' The guy lost it and started saying something, but we hung up and left. I went ahead and texted the manager that was opening the following day to give her a little warning.

The next morning the guy came by and started demanding they make him food for free and that would sue the restaurant and that he knew the owner and they golfed together. The owner was there, just out of view from the counter. He walked around and said something like, 'Yeah, I don't know you. Get out.'"

Subscribe to our newsletter

Closed Means Closed

Claudio Divizia/Shutterstock

Closed Means Closed

"I worked in a coffee shop. We didn't open until 7 a.m., but staff arrived at 6 a.m. to clean and prep the shop. On the front door, we had a metal shutter that was mostly down, and I was busy mopping the floor. One lady did the limbo underneath the shutter and asked me for a latte to go at around 6:30 a.m.

I replied: 'Sorry, we aren't open, you'll need to leave.'

'Yeah, but I just want a latte.'

'I just said we aren't open. Please leave.'

'Oh c'mon, it's just a latte!'

I held up my mop, 'Try again at 7 a.m. when we are open.'

She stormed out of the shop and yelled, 'You've just lost a customer!'

'We need to be open first to have one, you moron!'"

They Just Made An Innocent Joke Into A Nasty One

pathdoc/Shutterstock

They Just Made An Innocent Joke Into A Nasty One

"I used to be a bartender. A guy came in and ordered a french press coffee. While I was making it, we were talking, and he said, 'Oh yeah, I like my coffee how I like my women...can you guess?' For whatever reason, my immediate reply was, 'Full of cream?'

My manager was behind me and burst into laughter. I immediately regretted it. The look of horror on the guy's face was priceless.

Apparently, he was going to say, 'hot and strong.'"

Sometimes You Need To Read The Room

Serdar Tibet/Shutterstock

Sometimes You Need To Read The Room

"I used to work at a Butcher shop. We used to sell bags of bones for dogs, and we regularly had people coming in looking for them. Anyway this regular came in and asked, 'Any dog bones,' and one of the older butchers from the back yelled out, 'Nah, only beef and lamb bones, sorry.' The whole place broke down in laughter.

So about an hour later a customer, an acquaintance from my school days, came in and asked if we had any dog bones, so I replied, 'Nah, only beef and lamb bones.'

There was an awkward silence, he looked me straight in the eye and said, 'Go off yourself, you jerk' and stormed out of the store.

It took me a few seconds to realize that maybe that joke wasn't the best to play on an Asian person."

This Comeback Was Worth This Customer's Temper Tantrum

Ollyy/Shutterstock

This Comeback Was Worth This Customer's Temper Tantrum

"I worked at a sandwich shop, and one time a customer flipped his lid about the meatballs being cold. Whatever. We comped it and moved on.

He came back the next day and pulled the same shenanigans. He ate almost the entire sandwich and came up to me. I looked him dead in the eye, 'So, you're telling me the meatballs that are currently 185° are cold?' To which he replied 'Yes, they're freezing, how can you know they're so hot!' I lifted up the tray of meatballs with steam rolling off of them and showed him the thermometer. 'Well, you apparently don't have any qualms about shoving 'cold' balls in your mouth.'

The guy threw a third of a meatball sub at me, the owner kicked him out, and almost wet herself laughing. It was a good day."

No Amount Of Training Could've Prepared This Waiter For This Awkward Situation

Luis Molinero/Shutterstock

No Amount Of Training Could've Prepared This Waiter For This Awkward Situation

"I tried waiting tables while in college. The time finally came for me to have my own table during the lunch hour. The lady training me was watching from a distance to give me feedback. So I got to the table and could only see two ladies, both with long grey ponytails.

I proceeded to their table and said, 'Good afternoon ladies, how are we doing today?' They both turned to look at me, and holy smokes, one of the women had a solid grey mustache. Wait a minute, that lady is a guy and is with his wife. I tried to correct myself by saying, 'and gentleman..' The woman training me rushed over to rescue me, and she said: 'This is Adam..it's his first week.' The guy who I referred to as a lady said something like, 'Yeah he's gonna need a few more weeks.'

And that was my last day in my career as a waiter."

The Customer Is Always Right, Even When They're Crazy

CREATISTA/Shutterstock

The Customer Is Always Right, Even When They're Crazy

"Some crazy looking lady wanted 'ostrich cheese' at my Whole Foods.

I matter of factly said, 'Somebody might be pulling your leg; you can't have ostrich based cheese.'

'Why not?'

'Because cheese products are made from milk.'

She looked at me all mad and said, 'I thought the customer was always right. I want some gosh darn ostrich cheese. What an idiot.'

I paused to bite my tongue, but she just glared at me waiting for something to come of the conflict. So I dropped my body language to suggest she had caught me in a lie and said, 'Look, we both know you can't afford it. Ostrich cheese is a delicacy, sort of like goat caviar. It's too expensive to leave out on the counter. You'll never taste it.'

Not liking my response, the customer found the manager, who had a better way of handling the situation. They said something to the effect of, 'I'm so sorry, but we aren't able to carry that product.'

The lady was clearly irritable, and something was off. Now that I'm a doctor I feel bad about it. She was probably legit in need of help."

They'd Have To Commit To This Role If They Wanted The Big Tips

Iakov Filimonov/Shutterstock

They'd Have To Commit To This Role If They Wanted The Big Tips

"I was waiting tables, and I got this friendly looking couple. I walked up, and before I could start with the pleasantries, the guy saw me, and in a heavy Australian accent, said, 'Hi there mate. How are you?'

I was thrown off by the accent and by being interrupted before making an introduction, and for whatever reason, my mind could only focus on the accent, and so, when I went to respond, I did it in an Australian accent, 'Not too bad mate. Yourself?'

I realized I was doing it as it was leaving my mouth, but I couldn't stop. I was convinced I was going to get punched square in the face. It turns out my fake Australian accent wasn't bad. The guy was delighted to meet an Australian and even asked if I was in America on a work program.

Now I was stuck. If I admitted I was not Australian, I was worried he would have been offended, even though I didn't mean to offend him. If not, I have to play this part for the next hour.

Yeah. I committed to the role. I got a 40-percent tip, so that was nice and worth the stress."

This Customer Heard The Wrong Thing At The Wrong Time

Saklakova/Shutterstock

This Customer Heard The Wrong Thing At The Wrong Time

"I used to deliver pizzas. One time I showed up at a house, and they didn't come to the door. I went back to my car to get my phone to call them. I had been listening to stand up comedy on Pandora, which paused once I started the call. So I called them, and there was no answer. I hung up, and Pandora started playing again. It was Donald Glover doing a bit about how it's weird girls have to always be worried about getting violated and that he has never even thought of that happening to him. And that if someone wanted to assault him, they'd have to be real sneaky about it. Like he'd be at a movie theater, and he'd get up to leave and see some guy dressed as a chair run away.

I attempted to call the customer again, but this time Pandora kept playing instead of pausing automatically. I tried to stop the audio, and at that moment I heard the lady say, 'Hello' right as Donald delivered the punchline 'GOSH DANG IT I JUST GOT VIOLATED AGAIN.'

I heard the lady say 'Excuse me!?' I was in shock at this point, and I hung up the phone."

He Was Yelling At The Wrong Person

Tiko Aramyan/Shutterstock

He Was Yelling At The Wrong Person

"I was a waitress in college and slammed one night. I checked on a table after what had been a while and said, 'Can I get you some refills?'

Well, this guy launched into a rant, 'Yeah, we've been here forever. We haven't gotten any refills. And this was the worst pulled pork sandwich I've ever had in my life.' He went ON AND ON about this pulled pork sandwich being awful, but he ate the ENTIRE thing!

Like I said, I was slammed and probably listened to him complain for a whole two minutes. When he finally shut up, I said, 'I don't cook the food, dude.'

He was upset and ended up getting his food comped. He came in two weeks later, and I ran the food to his table, and he immediately started complaining that his mac n' cheese was cold."

There'd Be No Bullying In This Restaurant

Iakov Filimonov/Shutterstock

There'd Be No Bullying In This Restaurant

"I worked as a server at an upscale country club and had these two gentlemen come in for lunch. One ordered, and the other said, 'I'll have the same thing.' So I confirmed that's what he wanted and he replied, 'That's what I said, right?'

I brought out their lunch and the second guy complained and started getting rude with me because his dish had onions on it, so I said, 'Sir, you said you wanted the same thing, but I can have the chef make you another one.' So he said, 'Listen to me you, little prick. I know what I said, and I never said I wanted onions.' So I replied, 'If you ever speak to me like that again, we're going to step outside and work this out.'

He complained and moaned to see the manager, who unbeknownst to me was sitting at the table right behind these guys having a meeting with another member. She turned around and told the guy, 'After the way you talked to my employee, I should let him. How about you both apologize and move on.'"

They're Called Corn

De Repente/Shutterstock

They're Called Corn "Dogs" For A Reason

"I had a customer who ordered a platter of mini corn dogs for a party and then complained after they were served because their party was all vegetarians and the corn dogs were not vegetarian. After a little back and forth where he was asking for his money back, he said, 'How could I know that corn dogs are full of meat? I thought they were corn!' And exasperated, I blurted out, 'Well, what did you think the 'dog' was?' Then I realized that it sounded like we were actually serving dog meat."

They Wanted To Make Sure To Answer This Customer's Question

wavebreakmedia/Shutterstock

They Wanted To Make Sure To Answer This Customer's Question

"I was a server in a family-style large portion Italian chain restaurant with dining rooms in a basement. Apparently, a table got seated in a section that had recently had its server sent home for the night due to the end of the dinner rush.

Well, I was cleaning up my section in the small room adjacent to this room when a visibly angry man approached me and shouted, 'Who do I have to suck to get some service in here?'

A slight pause and then my response, 'What's today? Tuesday? Me. I'm Tuesday.'"

They Just Wanted To Help This Customer Cool Off

FabrikaSimf/Shutterstock

They Just Wanted To Help This Customer Cool Off

"I was rinsing glasses behind the bar with one of those giant, high-pressure sprayers that kind of look like a small shower. A guy was mad that we wouldn't return his girlfriend's obviously fake ID. He looked like he was about to come across the bar. Without thinking, I turned, still holding the sprayer and hit him full on in the face. He left. I didn't get fired."

His

oneinchpunch/Shutterstock

His "Compliment" Didn't Go Over Well With This Customer's Sister

"I am making a sandwich for a lady, and a regular customer came in. I'll call him D. He is a painter during the day an is usually a pretty normal guy. But at night, he's my favorite wasted customer. He's fun and hilarious. He comes in, and I wave and say hi. The girl smiles and excitedly says 'You know him?'

And I say something along the lines of, 'He's a fun wasted guy.'

The girl tells me he's her brother.

Even though she says it nicely, it still seems like she is bothered by it.
I realize what I just said and try saying things like, 'He's one of my favorite people that come here' because I don't want her to think I was judging him."

This Worker Made Sure To Give This Customer A Piece Of THEIR Mind

Rommel Canlas/Shutterstock

This Worker Made Sure To Give This Customer A Piece Of THEIR Mind

"I was 15 years old working in fast food.

A customer was screaming at a rookie, who walked away to get a manager.

The customer turned to me and said, 'Get her back here, I want to give her a piece of my mind.'

Me: 'Are you sure you have enough pieces to spare?'"

Luis Molinero/Shutterstock

"I Only Have Two Arms"

"This guy ordered three coffees. I brought him two immediately after ordering, so he asked where his third one was.

The first response out my mouth was, 'I only have two arms.'"

Their Jokes Weren't Going Well With This Manager

Lisa F. Young/Shutterstock

Their Jokes Weren't Going Well With This Manager

"It was my first job, and I was working back drive-thru at McDonald's. I was having fun with it when the first customer came through.

Me: 'How can I help you?'

Them: 'Can I get a minute?'

Me: 'You can have all the minutes you want!'

Next customer.

Customer #2: 'Yeah can I get a sec?'

Me: 'You can have all the secs you want!'

Manager: 'Hey can I talk to you real quick?'"