Having people over can be fun and exciting. It’s fun to meet new people or catch up with old ones until it’s not. Sometimes, people act out in other peoples’ homes and need to be thrown out for their behavior. People discuss times when guests in their homes needed to be kicked out. Content has been edited for clarity.
Leave The Dog Alone
“I hosted a happy juice tasting via MeetUP years ago. Several ladies signed up, most of whom I had a long-term friendly relationship with, and one guy. The ladies all arrived on time with hors d’oeuvres appropriate for a happy juice tasting. We had a selection of cheeses, crackers, nuts, and cured meats.
The one fellow walked into the closed home. He did not knock or ring the doorbell. Yeah, it was a meet-up, but you should still let people know when you walk in. My dog was at the door in a heartbeat, and the guy kicked my dog. A friend was closer than I was so she got in his face about barging in without knocking and kicking the dog.
Pretty soon, all the ladies were fussing at the fellow for being rude with his entry and being late. He was very angry and tried to say the dog attacked him. A bunch of the ladies swore he didn’t because no teeth were showing and there was no growl. It was only my dog coming to the door to see who it was.
The man insisted the dog should get locked up. After all, he is a guest in the house. The friend who got in his face told him he might think he was a guest, but in reality, he was just someone who responded to a MeetUP invite. The dog is family. To keep the peace, I put the dog into his kennel and tried to smooth things out.
The next thing I knew, the man was sitting at my breakfast bar and putting dirty boot prints all over the wall under the breakfast bar. I asked him to please sit someplace else or keep his feet off the wall.
The lady he was sitting next to whispered into my ear. She said how he was creeping on her and would not take no for an answer. She also said he asked her to leave a party with him. He never met her previously. I guess he thought happy juice tasting meant easy women. She had said no and he kept stroking her arms and asking her again.
I tried to speak privately to him about not hitting on the women. It turned out, in the few minutes he had been in my house, he tried picking up several of them. My friend who confronted him earlier went and let my dog out of the kennel. My pup ran into the room. The man slammed his foot on the wall and yelled that he told me to put up my dog.
I let him know I had not let the dog out; a friend did I also told him no one tells me what to do in my own house and certainly not by yelling at me.
I then said, ‘Ladies let’s lead this child to the door; and by the way you are banned from any event I host, any event these ladies attend, and if I have it my way you will be kicked out of the group.’
He left and tried to register a complaint about my event to the group, but thankfully the ladies had my back (and that of my pup) and the man was asked to leave the group and banned from rejoining.”
No Means No
“It was a Thanksgiving dinner at our home for about a dozen people maybe 15 years ago. My father, stepmother, a few friends, and a few cousins were in attendance. Likewise, my sister-in-law was there, and she has been ‘high maintenance’ for as long as I’ve known her.
I tend to be a bit controlling when I invite others over for dinner. I don’t want people whisking in and out of the kitchen’s cooking area because frankly, someone could be hurt when I’m removing something hot from the oven. With the original configuration of the kitchen, I had to walk a couple of feet to set something down on the countertop. At the time, we had a double oven with virtually no counter space on the left side of the double oven; on the right side of the oven was an opening from the dining room into the kitchen.
I left 10 minutes between courses so everyone in attendance could chat and let what they’ve just eaten settle a bit. And, of course, to sip more happy juice.
Even before everyone left the living room for the dining room, my sister-in-law wanted to know when she could start heating the vegetable casserole dish she had brought along. I told her I would take care of it. She asked a second time, while everyone was in the dining room when she could start heating her casserole. I told her again that I would take care of it. She asked yet a third time, the same question. She received the same reply a third time.
Meanwhile, the turkey was removed from the oven and was sitting on a countertop cooling down a bit and waiting to be carved (by my spouse). My guests were chatting in the dining room and I was chatting with them. The oven was turned off temporarily; I had placed an antique, porcelain bowl in that shut-off oven with brussels sprouts to keep them warm. The porcelain bowl was a keepsake with special meaning to me.
I planned to remove that porcelain bowl when I was ready to heat two separate casserole dishes (sitting on the table in the breakfast room adjacent to the cooking area of the kitchen) which would be accompanying the turkey which was not ready to be served!
Unbeknownst to me, my sister-in-law exited the powder room, adjacent to the breakfast room, grabbed her casserole dish from the kitchen table, put it in the oven, and proceeded to push a lot of buttons to turn on that oven (containing the antique porcelain bowl). I heard the buttons being pushed since I was close to the doorway between the dining room and cooking area.
I asked what she was doing. She said that she needed to heat her casserole dish. I said something to the effect that we had already discussed how I would take care of it. I shut the oven off immediately, removed that special bowl, pointed to the dining room, and told her to get the heck out of my kitchen. All my guests heard me (dad and stepmother included).
What this person didn’t understand was that she should not disrespect me in my house. She proceeded to grab her coat and went out the front door. She was walking up and down the street in a huff.
She has never been invited into this house again. She doesn’t understand how much she disrespected me that day (there were numerous other occasions too). So, we’ve been estranged since that time. My spouse gave up on her about 10 years ago. They are estranged as well. She’s been estranged from her older sister for about 15 years too. As I said, my sister-in-law is high maintenance.
While I felt sorry for her, as she has no friends (she drove them away too with her antics), she cannot be a part of my life, as life is just too short to put up with nonsense.”
Come On Bruce
“My friend of over 20 years is 20 years older than me, which means that he has children who are in my age range. I have a son who is in his 30s and has mental health issues. He gets very nervous and easily upset.
My son had not been able to make it home for Thanksgiving but came to visit later in the fall. I then made a Thanksgiving dinner, with all the trimmings, for the three of us (better late than never, eh). We ate at a nice table, had a great conversation, and we were enjoying each other. All of a sudden, my companion’s son, Bruce, came by.
Earlier in the day, I contacted Bruce with a question about my water pump that had stopped working. I told him I didn’t need or want him to come out to fix it. I was just asking whether I should just leave it, unplug it, or if I needed to pull a fuse. He has a plumbing trade and his father lived with me for over four years. We were friends for 20 years. When he couldn’t look after his place, ‘Dell’ moved in with me and I looked after him full time. I was invited to share Thanksgiving, and Christmas with his family which was always nice get-togethers.
Bruce arrived, and he was gone. He was accusatory, mouthing off, and had spit flying from his face. He was standing there espousing his rants while we sat at the nice dinner I had made. None of us were eating. I think we were in shock.
After a few minutes, and with no response from his father, who looked like he was going to cry. I told Bruce to leave my house immediately. He kept on with his yap-yap, getting louder and louder. A glance showed me that my son (who has mental health issues) was trembling, and he was about ready to cry as well. Seeing that Dell and my son were both very upset, I was very angry. I was not going to cry.
I ordered Bruce to leave my house immediately. He was being ignorant, to begin with, and his ego puffed up with substances. He kept on with his senseless rant. I had to put a stop to it before his poor father just keeled over.
By then, I was so angry.
I told Bruce, ‘Shut the heck up and leave my house now before I count to five. I will have you charged with trespass since you are here without an invitation, and you will not leave as asked. One. Two.’
Before I said ‘three’, he was out the door. Good riddance. His foul behavior was not going to be acceptable in my house.”
“The party included a total of ten people. Most had met each other before, but only a few were close friends. My wife and I were the links between them all.
Six of our friends arrived on time, but one couple (we’ll call them ‘Mark’ and ‘Sandra’) were late. The eight of us thought nothing of it and began our evening of games, talking, and enjoying a few drinks. We started at about seven p.m., and at roughly nine p.m, Mark and Sandra arrived.
Everyone greeted them and pleasantries were exchanged. Unfortunately, it was very clear that Sandra had been partying heavily. They were invited into the games, but Sandra declined.
Time passed with everyone having a good time, but Sandra was saying nothing. Finally, after maybe 20 minutes, she spoke.
She said, ‘Why do you try so hard to win, Rich? What personality flaw are you trying to make up for?’
A question full of slurs and a touch of anger stopped everyone from talking, and all eyes were on Sandra.
Unfortunately, I’d been in a place like this before with her. Sandra was angry while she was under the influence. The blood drained out of Mark’s face and his eyes went to the floor. I’d been here with him before too.
So, I responded to Sandra with something like, ‘What’s a game for if you don’t play to win?’
I don’t even recall if she responded, but the rest of the table started to stir back to the game. Sandra got another drink despite Mark’s suggestion for her to wait a while.
For the next 30 minutes or so, Sandra blurted out increasingly angry and insulting questions every few minutes, almost all directed at me. There were questions about my manhood, what kind of father I was, and an insult to my wife (which I will not write) that had me on the edge.
All this time, Sandra was eating up the attention and the shock on others’ faces. Mark sunk further into his chair and seemed as if he was no longer in the same room with the rest of us.
Then, the last straw came.
She said, ‘Rich, are you having inappropriate relations with Mark and his sister? You know Mark is with his sister, right? They’ve been doing it since they were kids. I don’t mind though because he’s not that good anyway. I just laugh when thinking about them together. And you too now, right?’
I glanced at Mark. A microsecond look of Just Kills Me Now from him. I’d had enough.
I said, ‘Sandra, you’ve got to go. Out of my house. I don’t care where you go but you can’t be here.’
Many curse words flew. How could I embarrass her? The room was stunning and silent. How could she protest after she’d caused such havoc?
Mark is one of the slowest to anger people I have ever met. At that moment though a beast was rising.
All six-foot-three of him stood up and said, ‘Sandra, we’re going. Now.’
He was angry like I’d only seen once or twice in our 30-plus years of friendship.
She protested, and he said, ‘Then find your way home. Rich, I’m sorry.’
I was shocked that Mark didn’t lay a hand on her. He was angry enough to do so, but he just walked away.
Mark headed for the door and still, Sandra sat there laughing at the scene she’d caused. Now, I stood and told her to leave in much the same way I had before, but this time with a few curses for her as well.
Then I said, ‘You’ve got 30 seconds.’
She looked surprised but got up and stumbled out the door, nearly falling in the front yard. At the curb, Mark was waiting in the car. Then they drove away.
Needless to say, after much throat clearing, sighs of relief, and incredulous looks around the table, everyone decided that it was time to call it a night.
The next day Mark called and apologized again. I reminded him that he had nothing to do with it. Still, I needed him to know that my wife and I had decided it was the last time we wanted to see Sandra. I suggested that just the two of us should get together. He told me then that while he wished it could be different that his life would be a living nightmare if he did that. We hung up the phone each believing that our friendship was over.
Now, Mark and I are still good friends, but there’s a rift between us. I don’t know that it will heal.”
“Two years ago, I lived in a shared student house with three men, or rather two men and one man child. The three of us were and still are close, had an amazing time living together, and always tolerated the man-child. Because we were such good friends and always had a good vibe in the house, we often had people come over, like a sanctuary if you will, for students who don’t just want to get smashed and go clubbing.
We often held movie nights, game nights, and dinner parties. So, on one of these evenings, the man child brought one of his friends, and, although they tend to behave, he had a history of bringing in people who disrespected the house. So, on this day, the man-child’s play date came (a few hours) early, and, as the man-child has no concept of what an adult party looks like, he left his friend downstairs in the living room in an unfamiliar environment with strangers.
So trying to be nice, I decided I was not going to be rude, and I’d engage in some small talk to make him feel comfortable, while everyone else was still busy getting ready. The usual student questions came up, like what year are you in, where are you from, and the obvious; what course are you doing? I couldn’t offend anyone with these, right? Wrong.
He said he studied law and then proceeded to tell me that my course (biomedical science) was much easier than his, and I couldn’t possibly fathom how hard it would be for someone like me to study law, but for someone as smart as him, it was a breeze. Okay, fine, whatever.
He then asked if I was studying to be a nurse.
I said, ‘No, I’m studying biomedical science, so, hopefully, I’ll go into research.’
He replied, ‘Oh, so you’re going to be a research doctor’s assistant?’
Like, really? An assistant? Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being a nurse or assistant, but I did not work hard to get into Biomedical Science, for someone to then assume, I was going to be an assistant. Do you think he would ask me the same question if I were a man?
I told him to leave my sight, leave my house, and that he would not be welcome in the house as long as I was in it. If he wanted to meet with a man child, they can meet at his house.”
“A friend dropped by, unannounced, while I was entertaining guests for dinner. He was inebriated, and I thought it was better to get some food in him than let him loose in his condition. I set another place and brought him a plate. He ate like it was his last day on Earth.
Halfway through the meal, he looked up and belched a mouthful of food all over the table and said, ‘I think I’m gonna hurl.’
I had him on his feet and out the patio door just in time to see him projectile vomit over a six-foot fence and all over the car parked on the other side. He then proceeded to puke like a freshman after their first drinks. It was both disgusting and impressive. I helped him to my bathroom, gave him a blanket, and let him sleep it off in the tub.
A short guy with a big mouth (the companion of a guest), interrupted my apologies to loudly state his intentions of ‘beating someone up’ and attempted to get around me to the bathroom.
I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and the back of his pants and helped him to the door. He may have brushed a wall or two on the way. His date for the night, one of my friends, said she should go too, but I insisted that I would take her home if she would point out the idiot’s car so he could be on his way.
Guess which car it was…
Pool Party Problems
“Most summer Sundays my boyfriend and I (six years together, and we are in our 60s) have guests over for swimming and a cookout. Children and pets are welcome. Bringing food is welcome, but not required, and it is always ‘bring your own beverages’.
A couple of years ago during one such party, people were sitting in small groups and talking, some were swimming, etcetera. At our table, there were three or four others, when one man, I’ll call him ‘Johnny’ made an off-color remark. It was mildly funny and got some chuckles from the table, as no one else had overheard. This dolt mistook the chuckles for approval, and he immediately got very loud, repeating his dumb remark several times, trying for more approval.
By now, everyone could hear him.
I quietly said, ‘Okay, Johnny, there are kids here, so that’s enough.’
He jumped up and shouted, ‘So what? They’re not your kids!’
Then he yelled at my boyfriend, ‘I don’t know how you put up with her nonsense. I’d have dumped her a long time ago!’
I immediately rose with fire in my eyes and moved toward him intending to physically remove him from my porch (he is half my age), but my boyfriend grabbed me and sat me back down.
Then the other men at the table showed the idiot out to his car, while I informed him he couldn’t talk to me like that at my house and couldn’t disrespect my other guests, and he could never come back. I did feel bad for his very nice girlfriend.”
She Lived There But Was Not Invited
“Unfortunately, I couldn’t throw her out. She lived there but wasn’t invited.
My flatmate and I had an arrangement. Unless mutual friends were involved, when having company over either I would go out or she would.
One evening I had invited my boyfriend and another couple for dinner, and she was going out with friends. She did not know the other couple.
She arrived home as we were having our main course, went to the kitchen, and came back with a plate and cutlery. She then reached to help herself from the serving dishes on the table. My guests and I were surprised (to say the least). So I asked to have a quick word with her in the kitchen immediately.
It turned out, she’d got bored and hungry out with her friends, but didn’t want to pay for a meal when she knew there would be nice (free) food and happy juice at home. She couldn’t understand why I was upset. I reminded her of our agreement and how she wasn’t invited. She simply couldn’t grasp that she had intruded. She complained again that she was hungry.
I made up a plate for her, poured her a glass of happy juice, and said she was welcome to eat on condition she did so in her room.
This must seem like a strict parent/naughty child scenario, but we were both in our late twenties and had full-time jobs. She was just a rather naive and socially awkward person.
I very quickly arranged to move out after that and shared my new place with real grownups.”
Not Even An Apology?
“A few years ago, we had a Christmas Eve party at my house, as we did every year. My wife’s family members came, not mine. Approximately 25 members came. Most were in their 30s, but not all. After singing carols, we played games. The games were fun, and the beverages were flowing.
One nephew took advantage of beverages being free and swished. We could see him changing from mellow to angry. At one point, he asked an older cousin a question about another family member. The cousin tried to be non-judgmental, even saying he couldn’t remember. My daughter knew I was getting irritated. All of a sudden, the nephew jumped in the cousin’s face challenging him to remember.
That was the last straw. I told the nephew he must leave, and someone was going to drive him home. He could get his car the next day. When he got outside, he grabbed the keys and drove home. Two members followed him at a distance. He only lived a few streets away but still could have hurt someone. He never apologized to his cousin.”
Crazy Thanksgiving Guests
“We had a Thanksgiving dinner for a few local seniors at our old place. We invited one man my husband played pool with who was a senior.
He arrived with some type of purposeful agenda to anger every woman there, or he was completely gauche. He was calling women all the horrible names in the book, and we warned him twice and then told him to get them out of our home.
I can’t imagine any man arriving at a holiday function that ridiculous. But he held a grudge against us for over a year. He lied and claimed he was a social worker (without a license) and that we had abused this Hungarian woman that spent her days stealing from people’s homes. The truth was we had helped her get a social worker because we realized her dementia was serious. But due to her dementia, she grew angry with us when we let her go from our life, so we had these two suing us.
Of course, we won the lawsuits, but it was nerve-wracking. All for being nice to two swindling creepy people. We learned our lesson from that. We are very careful about who we invite to our home now.”