Vacation is the time to get away from stress in our everyday lives, but what if that same stress tries to come on the trip with you? These people share the time a selfish relative tried to ruin their vacation. Content has been edited for clarity.
Who Even Invited Her?
“I have a good-paying job and am able to go on vacations with my girlfriend twice a year. One year, we decided to make plans to visit a few countries for our anniversary. Once we set the dates, we immediately paid for our plane tickets and hotel rooms. We were ready.
A few days before our trip, my girlfriend’s cousin came over to our house. The only time she ever came around was when she needed money, which was the case. Knowing her financial situation, I gave her $100.
She stuck around to chat with my girlfriend. Somehow our anniversary plans came up. The more my girlfriend gave more details about our trip, the more excited her cousin became. She said, ‘Wow! You guys must be spending a lot of money on all this.’
My girlfriend replied, ‘Yes, we are.’
Her cousin, ‘Well, would you mind if I tag along?’
I chimed in, ‘This is our anniversary but if you really want to come, we can’t stop you. Just make sure to book your flight and accommodations very quickly.’
She then asked, ‘Can’t you just book the flight for me?’
I said, ‘Yes, I can, but you will need to pay for your tickets and room.’
Her face changed. ‘I thought you guys would be paying for me, though?’
I told her if we INVITED her with us then I would have been more than happy to pay for her, but 1) I wouldn’t be inviting anyone else on my anniversary trip and 2) she asked to tag along, therefore she should pay for herself.
This did not sit well with her at all. She then turned to my girlfriend saying, ‘We’re family, why won’t you help family?’
My girlfriend didn’t reply. Her cousin didn’t understand the silence and said, ‘If we’re going to do this though, make sure we’re staying in nice hotels and I want at least $700 to spend.’
As if her asking us to pay for her trip wasn’t enough.
I looked at her with the most perplexed face and told her no one was going to be paying for her trip, especially when she was demanding so much spending money on top of the fact that WE DON’T WANT HER TO COME. I told her this trip would already cost us thousands of dollars for me and my girlfriend alone, so there was no way in hell I’d be willing to pay everything for her and fork $700 over for her to spend at her will.
She lost her cool.
‘WE JUST AGREED THAT YOU’D PAY FOR ME. YOU GUYS ARE SO SELFISH.’
I politely and quietly asked her to leave and that this discussion was over and reminded her that the only money she was getting from me was the $100 I gave her earlier…. so much for being selfish.
‘YOU’RE KICKING ME OUT NOW? YOU’RE A PRICK.”
She then looked at my girlfriend, ‘I CANT BELIEVE YOU GOT WITH THIS SELF-CENTERED PRICK.’
My girlfriend finally broke her silence and demanded she leaves at that very moment.
After a bit more fuss, her cousin left. We haven’t heard a word from her since.”
Man Child
“Once a year my parents very generously pay for a family vacation involving them, myself, and my brother. My brother lives in another country now, and my mom sees the family vacation as the only way to get us all together so she’s happy to continue to pay for all the trip expenses, especially since she likes to stay in more comfortable accommodation that my brother and I can’t really afford.
My brother has always been a little bit of a brat. He’s always wanting my parents to buy him expensive stuff, yet never working hard enough to buy it for himself.
Fast forward to the family vacation of 2018. My mom decided we were going to Norway, and sent out the itinerary she had planned. My brother sent back a request to add in Lofoten, and my mom explained she couldn’t fit Lofoten in this trip because there wasn’t enough time to get up there and also go to all the places she wanted to go to. My brother responded by spamming the family chat with photograph after photograph that he wanted to recreate by going to Lofoten.
For weeks my mother was chasing her tail going through maps and routes and budgets trying to fit Lofoten in, all without any help from my brother other than more photographs he’d found online. Finally, she had to give up going to Svalbard and throw in an extra thousand dollars to include a cruise to Lofoten. When she sent the updated itinerary, my brother didn’t respond at all.
This is also the first family vacation my parents invited my husband to join. When my brother found out all five of us would be road-tripping in a Sedan he got very upset and wanted my dad to rent a 7-seater instead. My dad put his foot down because my dad’s big thing is having enough space in the boot for all the luggage and he knew both my mom and I feel more comfortable driving a smaller car.
Finally, on the trip itself, my brother was the most inconsiderate and selfish he had ever been. He kept wandering off from us, doing his own thing, and when he was with us, he kept having us move seats or move our plans around to make him happy. Mind you, we were in our 30s at the time.
When we were finally in Lofoten, my brother had not planned any itinerary for how he was going to get to all those great photography spots. My mother had planned an itinerary but it did not include the Viking museum that was my brother’s lifelong wish (so he said) or the three beaches he just had to take these amazing photographs at.
After listening to them argue for twenty minutes over this, I finally stepped in and planned down to the minute an itinerary that was a pretty good compromise as long as we kept to the schedule. Even managed to throw in a sheep farm that sells handspun wool for me. Guess who threw off the schedule wanting to stop the car to take photographs and then complained (1) we didn’t have enough time at the Viking Museum and (2) that it was a crappy museum after we finally went through it.
One night when we had planned ahead to stay in and do laundry at the Airbnb, my brother threw a fit. He heaved an incredibly loud sigh, grabbed his wallet and coat, and slammed the door on his way out. When he came back later, the family was eating the food my husband had brought home. My brother had brought back McDonald’s. One portion only.
When my parents tried to talk to him about his behavior throughout the trip, he blamed my parents. ‘They were the ones trying to stifle him because they couldn’t understand that he’s grown up.’
The last straw that broke my dad’s heart was when my father wanted to transfer his own photos into his laptop to clear the SD card. My brother insisted my father transfer his photos to my brother’s external hard drive instead so my brother would have the copies for himself, and then my brother would burn a DVD for my dad after the trip. My dad has been a hobbyist photographer since he was a teenager and actually still prints his vacation photographs to keep.
My brother ended up dropping his hard drive while he was carting his laptop from room to room with the hard drive dangling from the USB cord. All the vacation photos were gone.
But the worst was yet to come. On the last night in Norway, my brother dropped a bombshell on my parents. He had previously asked them to book him a flight home for a week after we all went back home to Singapore, and my mom was looking forward to an extra week with her son. Now he revealed that the extra week was because he had asked his friend from Paraguay to come to meet him in Singapore so he could show his friend around, and had offered to put him up at my parent’s place.
At this point, my husband and I were staying with my parents while we were house hunting. We were both in my childhood bedroom, and our special needs cat was in a large cage in my brother’s room.
Prior to the trip, I had bought a smaller crate so I could keep the cat in my bathroom, and I had personally scrubbed down my brother’s room with bleach to remove all traces of cat. That room was cleaner than when my brother still lived in it. My brother had taken one look at the room when he got home and said it still smelt like cat. My mom was guilt-tripping me so I offered to ask my husband to sleep at his parents’ house for the week while I took the couch so that my brother could sleep in my room.
Now he wanted to bring an extra person into the house, but not use the room we had prepared for him. He wanted to move his mattress into my father’s music room to sleep there, and also have my husband and I move out of my room so his friend could use it. And by the way, he and his friend were going to fly to Thailand and Malaysia for most of the week so they wouldn’t be in Singapore much anyway.
My mom said no.
She said she did not know his friend, and she was not prepared to have a complete stranger live in her house. My father also told me not to give up my bedroom under any circumstances.
We had this conversation at the airport in Norway right before our 22-hour flight home. My brother didn’t speak to my parents at all during the flight, then stormed off without us at the airport. When we got home he was packing his warm-weather clothing and dumping his winter clothing in a pile in the living room while his Paraguayan friend awkwardly said hello.
I awkwardly said hey and my parents walked right past to their bedroom. I asked my brother where he was going and he said that since he wasn’t welcome in his own home (he has lived overseas for 8 years) he was going to get a hotel with his friend. Remember my parents had paid for my brother to come back to Singapore before paying for a trip to Norway, and then paid to postpone his flight back from Singapore to a later date, all in hopes of spending time together as a family.
All this took place in November 2018. It is now February 2019 and my brother still won’t talk to my mother. He’ll still talk to my father because my father is the sender of gifts, but my mother cried last night because it’s just passed Chinese New Year and he wouldn’t even respond to her saying ‘Happy new year’ while on the phone with my dad.”
A Nice Getaway?
“My boyfriend’s cousin has 4 children. Each of her kids is the personification of the word ‘bratty’. The said cousin refuses to discipline them and constantly makes excuses for their behavior. She’s also very judgemental of our decision to not have children. She has often made some snide comments towards me, implying that I’m the selfish brat who is depriving my bf of the ‘joys of raising children.’
For these reasons and for her generally entitled behavior, my boyfriend cut ties with her.
However, when he and I visited his parent’s home three days ago for his parent’s anniversary celebration, we ran into her again. My boyfriend’s dad had urged him to use this occasion to mend bridges with his cousin. So we both tried to make nice and engaged in small talk with her. During our conversation, my bf mentioned we were leaving for Melbourne, Australia for vacation in a few days.
At this moment, his cousin’s eyes lit up. ‘Oh that sounds like so much fun,’ she said, ‘My husband and I haven’t gone anywhere since our honeymoon.’
She whined some more about how hard it is for them with 4 kids and if only they could afford such luxuries. I could tell where this was going.
My boyfriend probably felt sorry for her and, being the kind and generous soul that he is, offered to buy them a weekend in a resort in Mt. Abu (a hill station in the Indian state of Rajasthan).
His cousin’s face scrunched up and said, ‘That’s nice, but why can’t you just take us to Melbourne with you?’
I could tell my bf was getting a bit annoyed, but still patient. He then said, ‘Well, we want to spend some time alone together. Plus we’ll be meeting some close friends there. Besides, Mt Abu is a beautiful place. Your kids will love it.’
In an annoying ‘Karen’ voice, his cousin said, ‘I still don’t see why you can’t take us to Australia. You’re being so selfish, going on this great trip and sticking your family with a cheap weekend getaway.’
My boyfriend’s mom chimed in, ‘He’s making a very generous offer. Either take it or leave it.’
His cousin who was wearing the expression that morons wear when they think they’ve had a bright idea, said, ‘Oh I know! Why don’t my husband and I go to Mt Abu and you can take our kids to Melbourne.’
Me: ‘What ???’
Cousin: ‘It’s a great idea. The kids can have fun in Melbourne with you two and my hubby and I can enjoy a peaceful weekend. This way the kids can actually spend some time with their uncle. You never make time for them!’
BF: ‘I’m offering for the last time. It’s either the weekend in Mt Abu or nothing at all. And why the hell would we ruin our vacation taking care of your kids?’
Cousin: ‘How can you say that? My kids are so well-behaved. You’ll have so much fun spending time with them. Besides, my husband and I could really use some quiet time together. You and sassy pants don’t have any responsibilities. You have no idea how hard it is to raise 4 kids. You can afford this trip. I don’t see why you won’t share with family.’
BF: ‘One more word and you’re losing my Mt Abu offer.’
On hearing this the cousin shut up. We all had dinner together and she was mercifully quiet. If only her kids had followed her example.
You’d think this would be the end of it, but NO! We had seriously underestimated her dedication to her Karenness.
On the morning of the day of our departure, his cousin showed up at my apartment with the kids in tow. I was shocked to see her of course and asked if something was wrong.
She smiled and said, ‘I’m just here to drop the kids off. You’re leaving tonight right?’
After taking a second to recover from the shock I asked, ‘Did you fall and hit your head on something? We told you we weren’t taking your kids with us. What part of that did you not understand.’
She then tried to convince me that my bf had called her later on and had agreed to take her kids. I knew this was bs and called it as such.
His cousin became enraged and asked if I was going to break her kids’ hearts, why would I break our promise, and how my bf and I could be so cold. I called my bf and after telling him what was going on I turned on the speaker.
My boyfriend proceeded to chew her out brutally right in front of her kids, telling her he would no longer pay for their weekend getaway and that this is exactly the kind of behavior that had made him cut ties with her. She tried to get a word in but he wouldn’t let her.
His cousin took her kids and stormed off. My bf and I are still wondering what made her think that this plan would ever work.”
