Leaving a tip for a server is more than just an indication that their customer service was excellent. Most servers make well under ten dollars an hour and rely heavily on tips to support themselves. Despite this, it is not an uncommon occurrence for a server to refuse a tip. The tip may have been degrading in nature somehow or not worth the server’s time. Nonetheless, these waitstaff have come forth to share their stories about the times they have outright refused a tip meant for them.
Content has been edited for clarity.
Here, Catch!
“This is a story my ex told me from her bartending days.
A waitress at the restaurant where she worked served a large business party one day for lunch. The party was large enough that they had to pull several tables together to seat them. My ex said the waitress, a friend of hers, busted her butt to make these guys happy, hoping to earn a huge tip from the well-off businessmen.
As they left and she went to clear the table, she discovered they had left less than a dollar’s worth of change as the tip!
She was so ticked off that she snatched up the change and ran out after them. It was right there in the parking lot that she gave them a piece of her mind. She had gathered all the change and without a moment’s hesitation, chucked the coins back at them. The men were showered in a rain of pennies.
The head of the business party stormed back inside and demanded to see the owner.
After hearing from the waitress and the businessman, the owner told him that he deserved to have the pennies thrown back at him and that he was banned from the restaurant from then on.
When he protested that he spent a lot of money there, the owner said that he can always find other guests because of his exceptional staff, but it was much harder to find good workers like her.
It doesn’t seem to happen very often, but isn’t it wonderful when your boss has your back?
I wish I had been there to see it.”
Apology Accepted
“I used to work as a waiter at Rockbottom Brewery. It was a great spot to work and their drinks were delicious. One time I was serving a couple when the woman told me she was the designated driver for the man. The entire interaction was great. They told me they loved their food and the guy kept telling me how delicious his drink was.
At first, I served him our red brew, which was about a 6% ABV brew served in a pint glass, but then I suggested an even stronger drink. I actually loved this brew, it was 8.5% ABV and was served in a twelve-ounce embassy glass. This guy was acting perfectly fine. He had one of the first drinks and then four of the ones I suggested.
He asked for a box to store his leftovers and the check. I quickly retrieved a box for him and the check. After he and his wife were satisfied, I began to wait on the other tables in my section. When I got back to their table, I saw they left the customer copy of the bill, not the merchant copy, and I could see that they signed it and left a tip in the imprint of the customer copy.
I looked around and saw that they were near the front door, so I chased them down asking for the merchant copy of the receipt. I explained to them that the merchant copy of the receipt was needed so I could get the tip they left. Suddenly the man flipped a switch and snapped at me. Just moments before he was happy and told me how he enjoyed the food and drinks. Within a few seconds, he completely transformed from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde.
Turns out he dropped the box that I gave him and ruined his burger and other meal. He said something along the lines of: ‘You didn’t give me a bag for my food so you don’t get a tip.’ However, his language was a lot more colorful.
I of course apologized and stated, that I didn’t think he needed a bag but I would have happily got one if he asked. I told him that if he sat down and waited about 10 minutes I’d have the kitchen remake his burger and pack it up to go in a bag. He refused and said that he didn’t want it because he thought that I was going to spit in it. I was disturbed by his accusation because as long as I had worked as a waiter, I had never witnessed such a horrible thing. I sincerely apologized again and tried assuring him that I would never do such a thing. I tried to calm him down from his squiffy stupor and said I didn’t want him to leave the restaurant upset. I then said, ‘I want to make things right, sir.’
He refused and I saw him grab his wife’s arm and forcibly pull her to the car.
‘Come on let’s go.’ I heard him bark at her. I followed him outside the restaurant and continued to try to get him to come back so we could prepare a new burger to replace the one he dropped. Once he left the parking lot I stopped following him. I told my manager about it and he instated a new limit on the drink I suggested to him. We could only serve 2 per person because of how wild the guy acted. I ended up getting no tip from the bill that night.
The next day my manager called me up and said that I had a phone call. I found it odd because anyone who knew me would call or text my cell phone. I answered the call and it was the wife from the night before. She apologized for her husband’s rude behavior and told me she wanted to come in and give me twenty dollars for trying to go above and beyond to satisfy her husband.
She also told me that they got into a huge argument that night and that he assaulted her. Not sure how bad it was, but it seemed that he at least punched or slapped her once and that he ended up spending the night in jail for it.
I thanked her for the tip and told her that the apology was really all that I wanted.”
Expect The Unexpected
“When I was young and in college, I worked as a waiter in an upscale restaurant. On a particularly slow evening, a couple came in and were assigned to me.
They were very demanding and ran me hard. We were slow that night, so I did not mind and gave them excellent service.
When they got up to pay, I immediately went to bus their table. I completely lost it when I saw what they left as a tip.
They left me a business card. Just a business card with ‘words of wisdom’ scribbled on it. After nearly 2 hours of back-breaking service, all they had left me was a business card.
I felt like somebody punched me in the throat. I took it very personally.
Looking up through the window, I saw them walking towards their car. Without any regard for my continued employment, I marched out and confronted this couple.
I yelled at the guy to wait…I walked over and waved the offensive card in his face and asked if this was a tip. What he said next still makes my blood boil.
He puffed up and said :
‘Yes, it is. Never expect you will always get a tip in actual cash.’
I ripped the card up and threw it in his face along with some choice words.
You know, I never EXPECTED a tip. It was the business card with advice I didn’t need or ask for. It was the most arrogant and disgustingly cheap thing I ever witness as a waitress.
Now and then I’ve had people who obviously forgot to leave a tip.
It happens and I do not think any less of those people.
This on the other hand was different.
The actions of this couple were just plain offensive.”
Gutter Ball
“In 1978, I was a waitress at one of the biggest bowling alleys in Wisconsin. It had forty-eight lanes straight across and stayed packed full of hundreds of people every night. I was a nineteen-year-old college student and thought it was a decent job. I was getting two dollars and fifteen cents an hour, plus tips.
The gig kept me on my toes every night. My role consisted of me taking drink orders at the alleys, repeating them to the bartender, then bringing the drinks down to the alleys or the counters overlooking the alleys, all while keeping the tables and ashtrays clean.
I worked hard. You never found me lazing around. I had a boyfriend I was very serious about, so in an attempt to avoid advances from the alley goers, I wore a fake wedding ring and an unfashionable skirt that hung down my knees.
One evening, my boss was standing near the counter talking to a friend of his. I didn’t know the friend’s name, but I will never forget him. He was an overweight, balding man in his fifties that was also wearing a wedding ring. I only glanced in their direction, but I could feel his friend eyeing me like a steak dinner long after the fact. I had a gut feeling this guy was bad news. I would soon realize that ‘trouble’ was an understatement.
The man ordered a drink from me which I brought back promptly. That’s when it happened. Once he grabbed his drink from me, he handed me a tip with his left hand, but with his right hand, he dove under my skirt and tried to grope me.
Appalled, I jumped back and threw his tip on the counter. The coins bounced off onto the floor. Seeing red, I screamed obscenities at him.
‘You’re a freaking pig,’ I continued to belittle him.
Immediately I realized my boss was standing right there and I turned to him, to see what his reaction would be. Was I going to get fired?
My boss sized me up, his arms crossed, looked at his friend, back to me, then slowly walked away, not saying a word to either of us. I guess he saw that I handled the situation myself.
My boss never brought it up again.”
A Tip Worthwhile
“I was working one evening at the classic Ground Round where they had penny-a-pound Bingo the Clown, popcorn, and of course balloons to entertain the kids. I waited on a mom with a little girl that couldn’t have been more than 6 years old.
As a server, I thought to myself, ‘welp that’s gonna be a crummy tip, why couldn’t the hostess seat adults there?’
After taking their order and chatting for a moment I discovered that the mom was a single mom with no other family to support her. Every time I went back to their table I got to know a little more of her story.
She clearly did not have a lot of money but liked to treat her daughter once in a while to dinner and this was the cheapest way to do it. Hearing the mother say that opened my eyes that day. I wanted to make sure she and her daughter had a great time.
I brought her extra crayons and coloring books. I also had Bingo the Clown spend more time at their table and brought her an ice cream sundae at the end of her meal.
That little girl was having so much fun. Her big eyes lit up when Bingo the Clown came around and handed her a balloon. There was so much excitement in her when she got her popcorn and dinner. It was obvious that what other kids took for granted, she did not.
When I went to make change for the mother’s twenty-dollar bill for her eleven-dollar tab she said to keep the change. Honestly, seeing that beautiful smile on her daughter’s face was well worth the price. I made change on the spot and told her to use this money to bring her daughter back again.
I felt lucky to be able to take care of such a wonderful family.”
Bait And Switch
“I was a waiter at a rather nice steakhouse while in college. It had linen tablecloths, candles, and a Napa Valley adult beverage list. You get the idea. As a general rule, a competent waiter or waitress typically has a pretty good idea of how things are going at a table.
On one particular night, two young couples were sitting at one of the tables in my section. We would call the table a four-top. Their dinner went well! After paying, the four of them were still sitting and chatting a bit, and I could see that they left cash on the tip tray amounting to a twenty percent tip. I was pretty excited to cash in!
It was after the two ladies excused themselves to go to the restroom that I realized their dates were total scumbags.
Once the ladies were out of sight, the guys removed all the bills from the tip tray and switched them out for some pocket change as the tip. They then casually walked back to the lounge to wait for their dates as if nothing happened.
Bait and switch!
The guys gave the appearance of being solid tippers in front of their dates but then stiffed me when the ladies weren’t looking. I was disgusted and yearned for revenge.
I waited for the ladies to exit the restroom. Then I walked into the lounge and put the tip tray with the few coins down in front of the four of them. I looked the guys in the eyes and said, ‘That’s okay, fellas, no thanks, I already did my laundry this week.’
Then I turned on my heel and walked away.
It worked! One of the guys skulked back to the empty dinner table with the tip tray now holding a 25 percent tip.
I shamed the guys into acting in an honorable manner.”
Keep The Change
“When my oldest son was in college, he was a waiter for a national restaurant chain.
One time he waited on a table of college students. These students were goofing off and making a mess. They were also very demanding, but my son remained patient nonetheless and gave them the best service he could.
Their final bill was over fifty dollars. As they went up to the register to pay, he noticed that they had left ten pennies on the table with a smiley face drawn in the sugar they spilled all over the surface.
He gathered up the ten pennies and gave them to the students while they were at the register. Smiling, my son said: ‘You left some of your money on the table by accident. Have a great night.’
The female student in the group turned bright red from embarrassment. To his amusement, my son watched her take off her backpack once they got to the parking lot and start whacking the other students with it.”
“Just Leave Already!”
“We had an old woman who was a regular of ours. She had early-stage dementia. Now, that’s something I can understand and can deal with, but one of her symptoms was that she lost her manners. Over time, she became less and less polite to me and the other waiters.
One time, she was out to lunch with some friends of hers. They were taking ages to decide, so we had back-and-forth interactions that went like this:
‘Have you decided?’
‘No, we haven’t looked at the menu yet.’
‘That’s fine, I’ll check back in a few minutes.’
Then while I was taking an order from another table, the old woman shouted at me, ‘Yeah so we have decided, we’ll take the ‘this’ and the ‘that’ and …’
I interrupted the person whose order I was taking. ‘I’m sorry, I need to do this,’ and then turning my head to the old woman I said as patiently as I could, ‘That’s lovely. I’ll get to you when I’m done here, but right now I’m taking this family’s order. All right?’
‘Yes, but we have decided!’
‘Yeah, I got that. Gimme a minute.’
She pulled a few more tricks like that on me that night. She repeatedly consumed ages of my time and attention in conversations that weren’t going anywhere and then demanded my attention in less than five minutes at the most inconvenient time.
Needless to say, by the end of the night, I was fed up with her. So when it came to her paying her check, I was relieved that I was done having to deal with the old lady. She paid by debit card and she hadn’t told me to include any tip. That was fine by me, it was all good. They were about to leave and I couldn’t wait. They had been so exhausting.
‘Oh, but I forgot,’ The old woman suddenly said, ‘I didn’t tip you. Wait, let me give you five cents,’ before she started reaching for her wallet in her purse.
I didn’t want to spend another second with her.
Not for a nickel.
So I told her, ‘You’re the sweetest. But, you know what? It’s all right. You take care of that tip next time, okay?’
‘Yes but…’
‘Don’t worry about it. I’m sure it’ll be fine.’
I forced a smile while the words kept itching to escape:
JUST LEAVE ALREADY! “
“Is He Serious?”
“People can be very degrading when they’re the ones paying.
I was in a bad spot waiting tables right before the night crew came in. There were easily thirty-two tables in the restaurant, and just about every single one filled up about thirty minutes before the night crew was scheduled in.
I had to do laps to keep up with everything. One at a time I would touch base with each table, while the manager ran the food for me. I’ll never forget this hectic shift.
I checked up on one table where a man and his friend were sitting together. One of them asked for a Miller Lite. The second lap in, I realized I forgot his drink. Without warning, he physically pulled me aside. I hardly had time to react to him putting his hands on me. It would his next words that sent me into an angry frenzy.
The man put a small stack of quarters on the table.
‘This is your tip,’ he said, ‘every time you forget something, I’m taking a quarter away.’
I looked at his friend. ‘Is he serious?’ I asked.
His friend shrugged nonchalantly.
I said, ‘A quarter. You’re going to take a quarter away from me. Did your grandma give you those in your birthday card? Can I borrow one for the pay phone to call the Ferrari dealership and tell them I’m going to be a quarter short on this month’s payment? Get outta my face with that.’
It goes without saying this was a very relaxed environment, but not so relaxed that one could come in and get away with treating someone like that. As a server, I was extremely accommodating, even blurring the line between customer/friend more than a few times. But, I’ll never accept gratuity from someone who tried to make me feel like a second-class citizen.
If memory serves me, I grabbed some quarters out of my apron and put them on the table. I then said the tip for the next server was on me.
I bypassed their table for the rest of the night.”
Big Money
“I was serving in a sports bar on a UFC night. Two middle-aged men, obviously old friends, were hanging out watching the fight and having a good time. They had a decent tab, about twenty-seven bucks each, and they seemed like nice, respectable peeps so I was expecting a decent tip of around five or six dollars apiece.
When it was time to cash them out, one of the two made a big deal about how he wanted to pay for his friend. He was loud, almost on the verge of shouting as he announced his selfless commitment to go over and beyond for his friend.
You can probably guess what happened next.
He paid in cash and tipped me about five bucks on the fifty-four dollar check. It was clear from the cash he left me that he expected the change to be my tip.
I wasn’t bothered by the poor tip of less than ten percent. I was bothered by the fact that he felt the need to play the ‘big important generous man’ who bought his friend dinner and hid the fact that he was too cheap to tip properly. I mean, his friend would probably have given me a decent tip. Most people do. But this dude actually cost me money so he could impress his friend.
I gave him his ‘tip’ back as change and pleasantly told the two to have a nice night. His face grew red and he was obviously either shamed or angry, I don’t know which. I’m guessing he was offended. He took his change and left me no tip whatsoever. Either way, I think I made my point.
Best five bucks I ever spent.”
Good Hearted Woman
“When I was in my twenties, I was in a rebellious stage. Even though I was raised on country music, I rejected it in favor of jazz because I thought it made me seem more sophisticated.
I was a waitress in a small town with one big honky tonk, called The Clover Club.
The owners had hired an up-and-coming country and western singer to perform there.
He and his band members came to the cafe where I worked and sat down at a table in my section.
I recognized him immediately, but as I said, I was rebelling against anything country, so I pretended not to be impressed.
Instead of a tip, he offered me two tickets to go see his show that night.
I gave him a huge attitude. Instead of saying thank you. I handed him back the tickets and told him I hated country music and was really into jazz.
I will never forget the surprised look on his face.
I had just handed back free tickets to see WILLIE NELSON!
What a frigging idiot I was.
I would kill to see Willie Nelson in concert now.”
